Book review: Foul Bottoms

Foul Bottoms
John Quirk, 96 pages paperback.
Adlard Coles Nautical,
ISBN 978-1-4081-2269-3

If you love funny stories about people messing around in boats, you’ll love Foul Bottoms. It’s the sort of book you can curl up with in the cockpit, cabin or at home on a winter’s afternoon and annoy the hell out of everyone else by sniggering to yourself and reading aloud small, humorous snippets.

From his early days as a child messing about in motor boats on the Broads of England, to maritime adventures in Africa, New York and Sydney’s Patonga Creek where he now lives, “Quirkie” tells a great yarn. First published in Classic Boat, many of the stories feature minor disasters of one form or another, my favourite being the New York psychiatrists with an underwear complex.

As a bonus, the book also includes detailed descriptions of how to build a replica wooden planked dinghy from the 100ft schooner America, including oars and mast. The chapter is headed Queen of the Creek, or “20 things some b*****d ought to have told me before I started building this bloody thing”.

His two pages of quotes are also worth a mention, including: Australia n. Nation of abstemious introverts with no interest in sport; and English n. National language of India, but not apparently of Birmingham.

Highly recommended for any sailor with a British sense of humour.

- Roger McMillan

Available from:

www.boatbooks.com.au